9 Ways To Set Better Boundaries

Tell me if this sounds like you…

Up until 9pm responding to those last minute client messages that feel like an emergency. 

Meticulously poring over every detail of your client’s plan to make sure it’s perfect. 

Refreshing and checking Whatsapp or Voxer 100X per day to see if your clients need something.

Extreme guilt during your “off” time because, “What if my clients need me?”

Then rationalizing the addiction because you’re living your “dream job.”

I call this an addiction because, deep down, it is. 

I say this because I love you, and I was you.

The freedom you wanted when you first started this career comes from space, not working more.

It’s called BOUNDARIES, babe. 

Here’s 9 ways to set better boundaries and gain more FREEDOM in your business.

#1. Airplane Mode

You didn’t really think it was just for airplanes, did you?

Look, airplane mode is my new best friend.

*I can feel you cringing through the screen*

“But Hannah, what if my client’s need me NOW?”

“They’re paying me to be there for them, I can’t just cut them off!”

I know you want to be there for your clients, and I know the guilt pit in your stomach you feel at the thought of missing a single message.

But I have some news for you…

They’re going to be okay.

Nobody wants a helicopter coach, and nobody expects you to be one either.

Space is ESSENTIAL not only for you, but your clients. 

It gives undivided attention back to your business.

And clients have the freedom to make their own choices. 

After all you're their COACH, not their agent.

#2. Unfollow Accounts That Don’t Serve You

Boundaries free up precious mental space.

Even if Email, Voxer and DMs are in the back of your mind, they’re STILL on your mind.

And if you’re like me, a sweet escape was scrolling through Instagram. 

But that takes up mental space too!

And if the people you’re following trigger feelings of scarcity, insecurity, anger or comparison...scrolling steals your magic. 

It steals your magic as a coach…

As a business owner…

And as a human…

Follow accounts that FUEL you, and gently unfollow those that drain you.

#3. Practice Saying No

Yes I’m talking to you, people pleasers. 

We all do it…

Saying yes to just about EVERY opportunity out of fear of disappointing others. 

But what if I told you by NOT saying no, you’re only disappointing yourself?

Every time we say yes to that client we KNOW is not a good fit (but we need the money)...

Say yes to a discount that we KNOW is not serving them our ourselves…

Or say yes to working on the weekend when we KNOW we need space…

We compromise our internal integrity.

Saying No means being confident in our boundaries, where we stand and the direction we want to go.

It’s time to start using it.

#4 Ask For Space When You Need It

Just a couple months ago this was an uncomfortable conversation for me. 

I never wanted my loved ones or clients to think I was unavailable to them.

But what I’ve come to realize is always being available isn’t much better either. 

If you’re going on a mini vacation and need space, tell your clients. 

If you need a couple days to get a project done, ask for the time. 

People respect you more when you ask for what you need, instead of holding in resentment. 

#5 Get Clear On Your Needs

We let people walk all over us because we aren’t clear on our own needs.

Or our own needs become synonymous with what our clients need. 

Either way, neither of these are ideal scenarios. 

In order to start setting boundaries, you first have to identify what you value.

Free time?

Communication?

Privacy?

Organization?

For each value, dig deep on what you NEED from it.

If I value free time, I may need 3 hours of undivided time to myself every day. 

From there, take action and create the boundary.

#6 Give Yourself Permission To Feel 

When our boundaries are crossed, we get angry.

Point blank. 

There’s nothing wrong with feeling angry, upset, frustrated or sad.

The issue arises when we set it aside and “push through” anyways. 

Give yourself permission to FEEL the emotions.

Ride the wave in order to give the emotion permission to leave. 

#7 Set Clear Expectations With Others

This one’s for all the chronic email checkers out there.

Yep, I’m speaking to myself too.

There will be no need to check your email, texts or Whatsapp past 6PM if you set the expectation that you’re unavailable then.

Period.

Believe it or not, clients actually do BETTER with clear expectations versus free riegn.

Setting expectations allows every person involved to act as their best selves. 

So, you don’t take calls on Friday? Set it.

Phone on airplane mode past 8PM? Set it.

You have a 24-48 hour response period? Set it.

#8 Take 5 Deep Breaths Before Reacting

Remember that anger we talked about?

It’s still important to feel it.

Just be conscious about ACTING on it.

So before sending an angry email or rash IG story, take 5 deep breaths.

Get back into the body.

Escape the mind.

And enter parasympathetic mode.

Empathy and anger can not coexist.

#9 Acknowledge All Resentments 

Unresolved emotions often lead to resentment.

Resenting clients…

Resenting people you hired…

And even resenting yourself.

Like emotions, resentment can’t be pushed down and covered up.

It needs to be acknowledged.

Close your eyes and feel it.

Ask the resentment where it came from…

How long it’s been there….

And what it needs to be resolved and complete.

What are boundaries you’ve set in your business? How are you upholding them? My comments are always open.

Love,

Hannah